I Can't Believe They Voted Me Out
by Thindy
Summary: Each person's point of view as they are escorted out of the fantasy survivor game.
1. Chapter 1

TITLE: "I Can't Believe They Voted Me Out" (1/4)

RATING: AA  
>CHARACTERS: Toby and the gang<br>SUMMARY: Each person's view in order that they were voted out of the "fantasy survivor game."

POV: Each character.

DISCLAIMER: The characters used from the West Wing do not belong to me; they are the property of Aaron Sorkin.

TIMEFRAME: Continues from "Where's Gilligan?"

***DONNA***

As I am walking away from the group I feel total disbelief and humiliation. How could they possibly vote me out? And first of all things. What did I ever do to them? I bet this is Josh's doing. It reeks of something Josh would do.

I feel so terrible. I wouldn't have been quite so upset if I was second, but first? How degrading is that? Oh well, not much I can do now. However I will make a mental note to put nutri-sweet in all of Josh's coffee's from now on. That should teach him.

I was escorted to another part of the island and it was incredible. The hotel that I was taken to was so extravagant and the men that I noticed hanging around the lobby were just too yummy for words. Maybe being voted out first isn't so bad after all.

It means that I get first pick on all the beautiful meat that is hanging around. Which bikini should I wear down to the pool tomorrow?

I entered my room and it was breathtaking. This suite certainly cost someone a pretty penny. I placed my luggage down and flopped onto the bed. What was I going to do now that I was completely all alone? I wonder if that Jeff guy is staying overnight here somewhere?

I spent about ten minutes dwelling on what I should do when I finally decided to go and venture around the hotel. See what people who have lives do on a night out on a gorgeous island such as this.

As I entered the lobby I immediately caught the eye of a tall dark and well bronzed man who was wearing only his swimming trunks and leather sandals. Well he certainly has potential written all over that washboard stomach of his.

I took a seat outside on the patio and ordered a strawberry daiquiri from the waiter. Tall, bronzed and beautiful approached me.

"Hi," he said somewhat shy. He smiled and revealed a beautiful set of pearly whites. Well hello handsome I thought to myself.

"Hello there," I said as sweet as I could.

"May I take a seat and join you?" Forget the seat buddy just take me I wanted to scream.

I gestured to the empty seat that he was mentioning. "Please."

"My name is Diego Bianchi," he introduced himself offering me his hand. I would have rather been offered something else.

"It's nice to meet you Diego. I'm Donna."

"Just Donna?" He inquired.

"Donnatella actually but I prefer Donna."

"Why just Donna when Donnatella is such a beautiful name for such a beautiful lady." Oh God please let him take me now.

I smiled and tossed my hair back so that it would fall across my shoulders. Thank you Pantene. "You're very sweet Diego."

The waiter came and brought me my drink and Diego ordered himself a martini. "So Donnatella, what man would allow such a creature of beauty to be alone on a lovely night such as this? Surely he must know how lucky he is to have such a woman as you?"

Smooth, the man was smooth. "I am here as," how did I explain this? "I am here with many friends from work but they are not here yet." I over emphasized the friends but I believe I explained it well enough.

"That is such a shame that you have not been escorted by your (pause) husband?" He asked searching for my status.

I raised my left hand displaying the bareness of a ring. "No boyfriend either."

"That is so sad Donnatella. But not so sad for me," he winked.

A woman was slowly approaching our table and I at first paid her no attention but when she stopped beside Diego I suddenly was interested.

"Diego, I have been looking for you everywhere. I thought you were sleeping."

I felt my heart leap into my throat. I watched as Diego suddenly grew uncomfortable. The mystery woman shot a quick glance my way.

"Who is this Diego?" she asked him in a jealous tone.

"I'm sorry I didn't catch your name?" he said to me. He didn't take his eyes off of me. What the hell was this?

"I- I uh," I didn't know how to respond.

"This lady was so kind as to allow me to sit down while I waited for a table of our own. As you can see Gina all the tables are taken."

What? Don't tell me she was actually going to buy this line of bullshit. But she did. She smiled and leaned over and kissed the man of my dreams and he responded quite well to her. I was going to puke.

I stood up and said, "You know what. You can have my table. I have suddenly lost my appetite for what's outside." I walked away abruptly before they could say another word.

I went back up to my room and sat on the bed. I sure hope someone interesting gets kicked off tomorrow.

***ABBEY***

Now I know how Donna must have felt as she took the walk of shame. I'm not really bitter, but that could possibly change if I find out that Jed was one of those who voted against me. I'll make his life a living hell.

After I entered my room I took a long hot shower and ordered room service. Once I finished eating I called down to the front desk and was given the information of Donna's room. She was next door. How like Jed to make sure we all get to be together. I left my room and knocked on Donna's door. I wasn't expecting her to be in but she soon answered.

"Abbey!" she cried grabbing me and hugging me. "I am so glad you are here."

"Well thanks kid. I didn't know I would make someone so happy for being voted out," I teased.

"Oh no Abbey I'm so sorry. I didn't mean it that way."

"I know Donna. Can I come in?"

Donna moved away from the door. "Of course. Oh I am just so happy that I am not alone anymore. The past 24 hours have been a complete nightmare.'

"On a lovely island like this? How is that possible?"

Donna told me the tale of Diego. "I see how that is possible," I replied. Donna looked so sad. "You know what Donna. How about you and I go out? Show this island what two hot American women really are about."

"I'd love to." Donna went to grab her purse.

"Leave the money here Donna. We'll let Jed treat us." Donna smiled and put her purse back down.

We wandered around for over an hour and were soon back at the same patio where Donna was approached by Diego. I leaned over to Donna as she took a sip of her gin and tonic. "If you see the shit let me know. I'll give him a name he won't soon forget."

Donna and I began laughing. This was good. And a lot of fun too. We managed to ditch the secret service men who began to follow us once we departed the hotel.

"So," Donna began smiling. "Tell me what I missed."

"Well I know for a fact that they all felt just terrible for voting you out."

Donna hesitated on asking me what I already knew she was going to ask. "Did you vote me out?"

"Of course not Donna. I voted for Jed," I answered smiling. That was the first time I referred to him as Jed in Donna's presence. It felt good. It felt as though I was just a normal citizen and I haven't felt that way in a very long time.

"I voted for Josh," she admitted as though she had regrets.

"Don't be hard on yourself. He deserved it."

"Oh I'm not. I'd do it again in a second." I raised my glass to her for a toast.

"Here here!" I said.

"I'm glad to know that they felt bad for voting me out. They should you know. Because I think I would probably have had a pretty good chance."

"That's why they did it hon. You were their biggest threat. So you keep that in mind as they come in here one by one groveling."

"Okay," Donna said happy with the idea.

"I think CJ and Toby have a thing for each other."

"No?" Donna gasped. "Really?"

I nodded my head. "They fell asleep together on the beach. It was so sweet seeing them together. I think it's about time they give their heads a shake and realize the strong attraction they have to one another."

"Wow!" Donna exclaimed.

"Speaking of shaking heads. When are you and Josh going to do the same?"

Donna spit out her gin and tonic. "Pardon?"

"Oh come on Donna. You don't fool me. Just like CJ and Toby didn't fool me."

"Josh and I are just co-workers," she said trying to defend their situation.

"Yeah and I'm the Queen of Canada?"

"There isn't a queen in Canada? (pause) Is there?"

"No. But there should be. And if there was you could've been a contender."

"No. Josh changed my status remember?"

"Right," I said as if this was news to me. "And you still believe yourself to just be co-workers."

Donna began to blush. "Abbey there is nothing between Josh and I. Believe me please, when I say that."

"I believe there is nothing going on because neither of you have yet to step up to the plate. But believe you me, there is definitely something there for the both of you. Maybe you just don't want to admit it, or maybe you're afraid to admit it?"

"What would I be afraid of?"

"You tell me? Or better yet tell yourself. Because girl, I have seen the way you two look at each other. And it's not the same way you and your fellow "co-workers" look at each other. You two could set off your own fourth of July fireworks."

"I'm sorry. I don't know what you're talking about."

"Yes you do. But that's okay if you don't want to see it. If it were me in your shoes I would probably take some time with Josh myself," I winked at her.

"Josh has a girlfriend Abbey incase you have forgotten."

"Oh please. As much as I adore Amy she isn't Josh material."

"She isn't?"

"No," I wagged my finger at her. "But you are."

Donna didn't answer me. She looked around at the other guests who were occupying the island. "It's a beautiful night," she said.

"Yes it is," I agreed glancing around.

"I bet it will be a lot better when Josh gets here too," I teased.

"You don't think he'll win?"

"Not as long as there is a breath in Toby's body I don't," I said smiling. We enjoyed a laugh and finished off our drinks. Then we headed back inside the hotel. Once we were outside our perspective rooms Donna asked me a question.

"Abbey, do you really think that Josh might like me?"

"I'd bet my children on it."

***JED***

I can't believe the nerves on those sons of bitches. Don't they know who I am? How could they turn on me like that? I stopped walking and began laughing out loud to myself. Of course they were going to turn on me. I would have done the same if I was in their position. I mean after all I deceived everyone of them excluding Abbey.

Oh my sweet Abbey. I can't wait to be with her again. For the first time in a long time we can actually spend some quality time together without the complications of countries blowing each other up. That usually puts a damper on the mood.

The secret service lead me to the Abbey's room and I was all ready to surprise her but she wasn't there. I am assuming she has gone out with Donna. I took a shower and by the time I was finished Ron had room service brought up for me. It's always great to have people helping you out.

Okay it's after ten and there is still no sign of Abbey. That's it, I'm going to look for her. In my disguise that was given to me I wore a bright Hawaiian shirt with khaki shorts and tan sandals. A black wig adorned the top of my slight grayish hair (yes slight) and I wore dark sunglasses and a fake mustache.

Checking myself out in the mirror I couldn't help but think of how cool I looked. I left the hotel room and went in search of my wife and Donna. As I stepped out into the patio there were atleast a few dozen people socializing on the terrace. Many were in the pool, at the bar, at tables and some were even dancing to the annoying music that was playing.

But the main thing I noticed is that all these people were so young. Where were the hip people of my age range? I searched for any sign of Donna or Abbey but I came up empty. At the bar I ordered a scotch and I hung back and watched the young people of a complete and irrational generation as they partied on.

Man do I feel old. A young girl who bore a striking resemblance to one of my grand-daughter's Barbie dolls came over and sat beside me. She was the first one to strike up a conversation with me.

"Hey handsome, how would you like it if I let you buy me a drink?"

Is she for real? "I wouldn't," was my reply. It seemed to have caught her off guard. I bet she hasn't heard the word no since she tried to play with matches as a toddler.

She giggled this annoying sound. "I'm sorry," she said assuming I must have been mistaken for turning her down.

"You heard me the first time. Say, shouldn't you be in bed?"

"Mine or yours?"

"Little girl I'm married. Do your parents know you are here?"

"Geez mister you're kind of a downer. I'm 18, I don't need to be babysat by my parents."

"Where are you from?" I inquired.

"I'm from America. The coolest country in the world where we party all the time and don't get bummed out by old horny men hanging out at bars," was this supposed to insult me?

"Not the America I come from kid," I said back. "Put some clothes on you look like a two dollar hooker." I threw some change down in front of her. "And for goodness sakes, call your parents and tell them you made a big mistake."

"And what mistake would that be?" she asked insulted and sarcastically.

"That you're a responsible adult," I got up and walked away. If I ever found any of my girls dressed like these kids were and hanging out doing God knows what I would have them locked up for life.

Disappointed that I didn't find my wife I headed back up to my hotel room. "Ah Mr. President?"

I turned slightly towards the voice that had called my name. "Shh I said to Ron when I noticed it was him. I don't want people knowing who I am. It will ruin all the fun out of this vacation."

"I apologize Mr. President. But I found the First Lady."

"Oh. That's great. Where was she?"

"She was in the room next door. Donna Moss is occupying that room Mr. President."

"Thanks Ron."

"Uh Mr. President. They don't wish to be disturbed Sir."

"Well it sucks to be them now doesn't it Ron."

"Excuse me Sir?"

"I'm going to disturb them Ron. Feel free to follow me if you wish but not too close. You'll cramp my style."

"Sir, maybe you would be better served if you were in your room for the night?"

"I'm not eleven years old Ron. I'm a big boy Ron. I can handle my wife."

"But she said specifically not to let you up there Sir." I had stopped walking and turned around to face Ron.

"She said that?"

"Yes Sir."

"Ron I'm going to need a few things."

"Whatever you need Mr. President."

"For starters I'd like some fresh strawberries, chocolate hot sauce, chocolate mousse, some champagne and," I was thinking of what else I might need.

"And Sir?"

"Lobster and shrimp. And I would like a lot. And also Ron, can you have the room service shut down from Donna's room please?"

"Of course Sir. Will there be anything else?"

"Yes. I'd like you to call Abbey once more and ask her to join me. Call me in my room with her response and I will confirm my next course of action then."

"Yes Sir." I continued walking. They way to my wife was through chocolate. And I was about to drown her in it.

It took ten minutes before Ron called me back with a rejection from Abbey. Now it was time to take matters into my own hands.

After hanging up with Ron I called the front desk and had them connect me to Donna's room. On the third ring Donna answered.

"Hello Donna, this is President Bartlet. Would you mind please putting my wife on the line." I waited while Donna whispered to Abbey that I was on the line.

"Abbey darling. I see that you haven't missed me."

"Jed, we're having a girls night out. I see that you didn't last long on that island without me."

"But I lasted longer than you sweetie pie."

Abbey chuckled. "I had assumed you would outwit, outlast and outplay. I believe that is the way the slogan goes is it not? Therefore I took it upon myself to make plans with Donna."

"Well then. I completely understand my dear. You stay and have your fun with Donna. I wouldn't want to interrupt a girls night."

Abbey didn't say anything at first. "Alright Jed, what's going on?"

"Why Abbey, what ever do you mean?"

"You know what I mean Jed. You don't get defeated easily. Why are you not putting up a fight about this?"

"Abbey. I am shocked that you would think I would fight with you over something as small and meaningless as this. You are right, you made plans and who am I to change them. I wouldn't deny you that now would I honey bunch."

I guess Abbey was considering what I said. Her tone softened. "Well that's very noble of you Jed because Donna and I are having a great time over here. I'm sorry that you can't join us, it being a girl thing and all."

"Nonsense Abbey. I am quite content being all alone in the room here. I've got champagne, lobster, shrimp, chocolate sauce to go with my fresh strawberries. I am extremely comfortable."

There was silence on the other end. "Abbey?" I repeated her name again. She didn't respond.

Suddenly there was loud knocking coming from my door. Who ever could that be? "I'm sorry. This room is occupied and is for men only." I shouted out.

I could hear Abbey getting hysterical on the other side of the door. "It's been reserved as a boys night out. Wish you could join us but with it being a male thing and all," I glanced at Ron who was hiding his laughter in a decorative pillow.

"And that my friend. Is how you handle my wife," I held out the plate of lobster offering it to Ron. This vacation was fun!


	2. Chapter 2

TITLE: "I Can't Believe They Voted Me Out" (2/4)

RATING: AA  
>CHARACTERS: Toby and the gang<br>SUMMARY: Each person's view in order that they were voted out of the "fantasy survivor game."

POV: Each character.

DISCLAIMER: The characters used from the West Wing do not belong to me; they are the property of Aaron Sorkin.

TIMEFRAME: Continues from "Where's Gilligan?"

***OLIVER***

After checking into my room I showered and changed into some fresh clothes. I couldn't wait to get downstairs and start hitting on some babes. I knew that Donna and the Bartlets were here and I was looking forward to seeing them again.

Once outside I ordered a drink and I was somehow drawn to the beach. The water was just so beautiful and it felt refreshingly cool against my skin as I walked along side it. I didn't get far before I heard my name being called out. A quick glance and I spotted Abbey as she waved me over.

"Long time no see," Donna got up and gave me a hug.

"Hello," I said taking a seat at their table.

"You were hanged I see," Bartlet spoke.

"Yes. There were too many lawyers on that location therefore Sam felt it his duty to defeat me and send me packing."

"Sam won immunity?" Donna asked excited.

"He sure did. You know I would have never taken him for being so smart. But apparently that he is."

"Of course he is. I don't work with stupid people. Only the best," Bartlet raised his glass. "To Sam."

"To Sam," we all said in unison as our glasses clinked against each other.

"I need gossip," Donna said grabbing my hand. I smiled at her.

"And here I was hoping you had some for me."

"CJ gave Josh a black eye," I offered.

"No way," Donna exclaimed.

"Good for her," Abbey said taking another sip of her beverage.

Jed Bartlet just smiled as if he was already aware of this information. "Why?" Donna asked.

"It appears that Josh bragged about being this great fisherman to Toby and he called him on it."

"Josh can't fish," Donna said.

"No shit," I replied. "He blamed his lack of fish catching on the net he had been working with. So Toby gets all Tobyish and Josh gets defensive and the next thing you know he is out in the water trying to catch some fish to prove Toby wrong."

"I don't see why that would be cause for CJ to hit Josh. Not that I'm complaining mind you," Abbey said.

"Yeah well, Josh stole something that belonged to CJ and used it for his trapping." As they hung on waiting for me I took another sip of my glass and caught the attention of the waiter for a second one. "He stole her bra."

Abbey and Donna gasped while the President burst out laughing. Abbey slapped him on the side of his arm. "That's not funny Jed."

"Yes it is," he responded during his laughter.

"Oh my gosh. I'd have hit too."

"That's not the worst of though Donna. He put his make belief spear right through one of the cups. The bra is ruined and it's the only one CJ had on her."

Now all three of them were laughing and I soon joined them. I felt terrible for CJ but I had to admit it was funny when she showed it to all of us. "Poor CJ," Abbey giggled.

"Lucky bastards," Bartlet threw in getting a dirty look from his wife. "What? Abbey I'm sorry but it's every man's fantasy to be trapped on a deserted island with a braless babe."

"Amen," I said saluting the President.

"Josiah Bartlet. That is our CJ you are referring to."

"I know Abbey. I say it in good fun," the President was making peace with his wife when he blurted. "I sure hope there isn't any bopping around in the next challenges or she may black out all their eyes."

Now it was only Bartlet and I laughing as the women stared us down with daggers in their eyes.

We headed back to our separate rooms and it was Donna who offered us to join her in hers. Since neither of us had any immediate plans we all happily accepted. Bartlet ordered us some drinks for a nightcap.

Forty five minutes later we were deep in discussion of our past. We all suddenly realized that we didn't quite know a lot about one another and so we figured we would change that. Since Abbey and Bartlet knew each other obviously well, Donna and I did most of the sharing.

"While in law school I supported my family playing the drums in this lame rock band," I told them.

"Really? You have a family?"

"Well I did Donna. My wife hated me playing the drums. She thought it was beneath her and so finally she took my son and left me."

"Oh Oliver," Abbey said. "That's terrible."

"The kicker is eventually she got remarried. And it was to another drummer," I gulped my drink and started laughing.

"She wasn't worthy of you Oliver," Donna said trying to be consoling.

"Ahh, it didn't bother me. I lined up the next Mrs. Babish a week after the first one split."

"Oh," Abbey said shocked.

"Well I'm glad that you had someone to stand by your side while you put yourself through law school."

"Nah, she left me too."

"For another drummer?" Bartlet asked smiling.

"Actually no. Allison left me for the sitter who babysat our daughter. I knew that Mrs. Wilson was trouble the first day I met her divorced ass."

Everyone stared at me as though I was crazy. "Your wife left you for another woman?" Donna asked. She made it sound as if it had never happened to anyone before.

"Yep."

"Man that's rough," Bartlet said looking away.

"Just how many times have you been married Oliver?" Abbey inquired.

"Uh," I took a second to count them. "Four."

"Four?" Donna and Abbey chorused.

"I haven't given up though."

"Good for you," Bartlet raised his glass to me.

"Yeah, I mean there's got to be another soon to be ex Mrs. Oliver Babish out there somewhere. I just have to find her, romance her, annoy and then get dumped by her. I figure it can't be that hard?"

"Oliver!" Abbey threw one of the pillows at me. "That's a horrible thing to say."

"What can I say. I'm a masochist for marriage."

"I'd like to get married one day," Donna spoke up.

"I'm glad to hear that Donna," Bartlet told her. "I think you'd make someone a terrific wife."

Abbey smiled and swirled her scotch around in her tumbler. "I was telling Donna how she should make a move on our Josh."

Bartlet spit his drink into a napkin and wiped his mouth. "Are you nuts Abbey? Josh Lyman?"

"Yes Jed. What's wrong with Josh Lyman? I think he's charming and perfect for Donna."

"There is nothing charming about Josh Lyman," Bartlet said in disgust. "He's a moron."

"You don't really believe that Jed and you know it. You adore Josh."

"No Abbey. The word you are thinking of is abhor. I ABHOR Josh."

"You're not fooling anyone Jed so shut up," Abbey ordered. "Donna and Josh are perfect for one another."

"Well we don't even know for sure if Josh likes me," Donna said.

"Oh come on Donna. You mean to tell me you haven't seen the way he looks at you?" I asked her not buying her statement.

"I'll rip his eyes out," Bartlet threatened in a fatherly tone.

"Stay out of this Cujo," Abbey demanded pushing him over. "I think that they would be just lovely together. And of course Josh fancies Donna. What's not to fancy?" 

"Donna deserves someone who will respect her," Bartlet said trying to sit back up without spilling his drink.

"Josh respects her," Abbey said. Apparently Donna wasn't needed in the decision of her love life. So we just smiled at each other and listened to the Bartlets as they fought back and forth.

"Like he respects Amy? Abbey how many times have you had to chastise him over the way he treats her?"

"I don't chastise him Jed. I simply give him some friendly advice."

"That's chastising Abbey. It's the same thing."

"Not its not," Abbey argued. They went back and forth until finally Donna and I passed out from boredom.

***CJ***

Did he just say my name? I think he said my name. Okay the schmuk is still speaking and yes, it is true. He said my name. I got up and left immediately as I was prepared to at the beginning of this stupid game.

I am going to kill them. I will use severe pain on each and everyone of them. I can't believe they voted me out. I'm CJ for Christ's sake. I followed this big homely looking fellow to a small helicopter.

"Where are we going?"

"I am to take you back to the hotel where the other people are, homely replied back to me.

I got into the helicopter and we began to ascend. It didn't take as long as I expected to reach the hotel. It was lovely from what I was able to see considering how dark it was. I entered the lobby and was amazed by the amount of young people that were hanging about. A few good looking men walked past me and smiled. Well this certainly had potential.

Not in the best of moods I went to the front desk and was waited on by a snooty looking girl who to me had an attitude. "Can I help you?"

"I'm assuming that's your job. I'm CJ Cregg, there should be a room here for me," I glanced around again.

"Yes we do have a Claudia Jean here."

"CJ will do just fine. Where am I?" I needed a shower so bad.

"If you could sign here please I can release your card to you."

"Do you have a place here to buy clothes?"

"You don't have your own?" she asked me rudely.

I glared down at her. "Do I look like I have clothes with me?" I raised my empty hands.

"There is a gift shop on the second floor. I am sure you can find something suitable in there tomorrow."

"Tomorrow?" I questioned her. I can't wait until tomorrow. What was I going to sleep in.

"Yes tomorrow. They do close at night you know."

I signed the paper and she handed me my card. She didn't tell me to enjoy my stay. Aren't they supposed to say that? "Your attitude wouldn't last an hour in the States. But should you ever visit feel free to look me up. I'll be sure to give you the same hospitality as you have given me." I began to head for my room.

I was dreaming of Bruce Willis when I was awakened by the knocking on my hotel door. "Go Away!" I shouted rolling over.

"CJ! It's Donna. I have some clothes for you."

"I'm sleeping," I shouted back. I grabbed the extra pillow and held it over my head. The knocking continued.

"I'm not going away until you open this door CJ," Donna threatened.

I rolled back over and flung the pillow across the room. Grabbing the sheet I wrapped it around my body since I was naked. I whipped the door open and was disgusted at the sight of Donna looking all perky and happy. "I was sleeping," I grumbled.

"And now you're awake. This works out perfectly." Donna brushed past me and entered my room. "Wow, nice room. I like what you have done to the place."

Trying to pry my eyes open I took a look around the room. I had made a complete mess. I never bragged about being clean. Donna began to tidy up. "Are you cleaning my room?"

"I don't mind, besides someone has to do it."

"No. That's why they have maids Donna."

"CJ here," Donna handed me a bag. I took it from her and looked inside. There was a nice silk blouse in a lavender colour, a black skirt, a matching set that included a blue thong and brassiere.

"Oh God a bra. How glad I am to see on of these."

Donna smiled. "Yeah we heard. How's Josh's eye by the way?"

"Fortunately for him it's healing. He's lucky I didn't knock him unconscious I was so pissed off at him."

"I can imagine. He does such idiotic things sometimes without thinking. Well what are you waiting for? Get dressed so we can meet the others for breakfast."

"The others? What time is it anyway?"

"8:30."

"8:30?" I repeated in a loud voice. "I'm on vacation."

"Yes we are. So lets go make the best of it. There are plenty of yummy guys out there and I for one don't plan to sit around and waste a perfectly free holiday."

Blondie had a point. "Give me a few minutes to wake up and change into these," I held the bag up. Donna continued on cleaning up.

I walked towards the bathroom and opened the door. I turned to Donna. "Hey Donna?"

"Yeah CJ?"

"Thanks."

"No problem CJ. Now hurry."

A few minutes turned out to be twenty. Donna and I went downstairs and joined Abbey, the President and Oliver by the pool. I started laughing when I noticed Bartlet's disguise. "Very discreet Mr. President."

"I'm a babe magnetic in this thing."

"Don't start that crap again Jed. I don't think I can handle hearing it anymore," Abbey warned her husband.

We did the greeting thing and then we ordered breakfast. "Who pays for breakfast?" I asked.

"I do," Bartlet responded.

"That's what I wanted to hear," I replied as I roamed through the menu. I ordered steak and eggs, toast, pancakes, orange juice and coffee.

"CJ slow down. Where do you plan on putting that?" Oliver asked me.

"In my mouth Oliver. I'm hungry."

"So they got you too. I was expecting Leo to be the next one out."

"If I know the brat pack they'll be kicking him out tonight."

Bartlet laughed. "That's good to hear."

"So," Donna began. "Tell us what's been going on?"

I leaned back and stretched my legs out a bit. "Well Batman and Robin were on my side for awhile but that ended fast."

"Batman and Robin? That's Josh and Sam right?" Bartlet asked.

"Actually together those two or more like Tweety and Sylvester. One's a big pussy and the other one is just a bird."

That got a laugh. "I was talking about Toby and Sam. Toby promised he wouldn't kick me out but he didn't really stand a chance against Leo, Charlie, Josh and Sam."

"Oh sure they gang up on the strong women," Donna said sounding angry.

"That's because they don't stand a chance against us," Abbey stated smiling.

"I'm hoping Charlie kicks their ass though," I said.

"Me too," they said together.

"What else happened?" Bartlet asked.

"The usual. We fought. You would think it would be fun to be the only woman on an island with five men but you know what? It's overrated."

"With those guys sure," Oliver said. "Now if you had real men-" Oliver smiled and winked at me.

"Whatever," I replied. I thought of Toby for a minute. I missed him already. He better be missing me.

Our food came and we ate and then went for a walk along the beach ending up swimming after our stomach's were able to handle the exercise. Later on we joined for dinner and then went dancing at the local club. I had a lot of fun. I have never seen the President get down and boogey like he did. It was nice seeing him be free.

On our way back we ran into Leo in the lobby. The President ran over to his old friend and gave him a hug. "I missed you buddy."

"Mr. President? I sure hope that's you."

"Of course it is Leo. Who else would be hugging your decrepit old body?"

"And to think I was looking forward to seeing your ugly mug again," he teased back.

We were gathered at the elevator talking and we walked Leo to his room and followed him in uninvited.


	3. Chapter 3

TITLE: "I Can't Believe They Voted Me Out" (3/4)

RATING: AA  
>CHARACTERS: Toby and the gang<br>SUMMARY: Each person's view in order that they were voted out of the "fantasy survivor game."

POV: Each character.

DISCLAIMER: The characters used from the West Wing do not belong to me; they are the property of Aaron Sorkin.

TIMEFRAME: Continues from "Where's Gilligan?"

***LEO***

It was obvious that I wasn't about to be alone so while I showered I told everyone to get comfy until I returned. It was great seeing everyone again. I am so glad to be back in a civilized world.

I stood in the shower until the hot water ran warm. I then shaved and dressed and reunited myself with the group.

"It's about time," the President exclaimed when I came out.

"Man I sure needed that."

"Feels good doesn't it?" Oliver asked me as he handed me a bottled water.

"Oh yeah. You tend to appreciated these things once you no longer have the use of them."

"I'm with you Leo. I will never take for granted a toilet ever," Abbey said smiling. "That had to be the worst two days of my life."

"I am just so glad to get away from Josh and Toby. I swear they're worse than children."

Everyone laughed. "What did Dumb and Dumber do now?" Bartlet inquired.

"What didn't they do is more like it? They fought over everything."

"Yeah that sounds like them," Bartlet said laughing.

"So what should we do now?" Donna asked.

"Let's go out and party," Oliver suggested.

"I'm not up for that guys. But you go on ahead. I'll just catch something on this old television here."

"Nonsense Leo. If you're not going out then neither am I."

"Mr. President,"

Bartlet raised his hand. "I'm on vacation Leo. And while I am on vacation I am just Jed Bartlet. So please, no formalities here."

I nodded. "Very well then Jed."

"So, I'll raise the question again. What should we do?" Donna repeated once more.

"We can sit around and gossip about those still remaining on the island," CJ recommended.

And that was what we all agreed upon. Drinks were poured and food was ordered and we all gathered around on the double bed that occupied my room. I have never done anything quite like this and I was for once, excited about being a part of a group.

"I'll start," Donna said. "I'll do Josh."

"There's a surprise," Oliver mumbled. Donna couldn't reach Oliver so she asked Abbey to smack him. Abbey was more than happy to comply.

"That was worth waiting for," Abbey teased.

"Okay so what do you guys want to know?"

CJ spoke up. "I have an even better idea. How about we play a revised game of balderdash, only instead of words we can write something embarrassing about the guys?"

"How does that work exactly?" Oliver asked.

"What's baldersplash?" Bartlet inquired.

CJ chuckled. "First of all, it's BalderDASH not splash. And it's a bluffing game. Usually you take a word and everyone has to make up a meaning for it and then we all guess which answer is correct."

"How if we all make up the meaning?"

"Because Leo, the person that would be reading the word out would be the one writing out the correct answer and then mixes it up with the ones that you guys would have written."

"Ahh," I said still not understanding what she just said.

Oliver was confused. "I know how to play regular Balderdash but I don't quite understand what it is you want to change?"

"Okay listen. Each of us will take turns choosing something intimate that we might know about the guys. Then you will write down whom it is we're talking about. Each person will put in say 20 bucks. And the person with the most answers in the end wins the pot."

Everyone caught on to what CJ was talking about now. "But what if we don't know something intimate?"

"Then you won't be the one revealing anything Leo," Abbey said laughing. That made sense.

CJ leaned over and opened the drawer. There was a small pad of paper and a pen inside. How did she know that? She handed us a few sheets of paper each. "There's only one pen so we'll have to share. I'll go first and then you write down who it is you think I'm talking about once you get the pen."

"Okay," we all answered.

CJ cleared her throat. "Okay let me think. (pause) Oh I got one. This person was on a date with a girl. They went back to her place and started, you know fooling around."

"Oh this is good," Oliver said.

"Shut up Oliver," Abbey warned.

"Well, while they were doing it, her parents came home. In a hurry to get dressed and get out of there he accidentally threw on her underwear instead of his own. He didn't realize his mistake until he got home and changed."

Oh my goodness. I don't have a clue who it was but I know that he's a moron. Abbey was the first one to write and I was second to last to get the pen and write my answer. I wrote down Josh. We folded our papers and then handed them to CJ.

"The correct answer is Toby."

"Toby?" Jed said surprised. "I figured Josh."

"So did I," Abbey and I replied.

"I said Toby," Donna said. Oliver closed his eyes.

"I chose Sam," he said.

"Why Sam? Sam's a good boy," Jed asked.

"Yeah but he has a habit of forgetting his drawers. I figured it had to be him."

"I won," Donna cried out. "Woohoo for me. Does that mean I go next?"

"Yep," CJ made a mark on the pad of paper that Donna had scored the first and only point.

"Okay this one's good. One of the guys that is still on that island had a blind date with a man."

"You're shitting me?" CJ squealed.

"I'm sorry did you say a man?" I must have misunderstood what she said. There couldn't possibly be someone on my staff who would date a man.

"That's right Leo. A man."

"Good God," Bartlet sighed. We all took our turn writing down who our guess. Once we were finished Donna revealed that it was Charlie.

"Wow, three of you picked Josh." Donna handed us back our papers. "Oliver and Abbey were right."

Abbey gave Oliver a high five. "Wait a second, wait a God Damn second," Bartlet said holding up his hand. "Do you mean to tell me that Charlie is a switch hitter?"

"A what?" Abbey said almost choking on her drink.

"Isn't that what they call people who play on both sides of the team?"

"What TEAM Jed? This is Charlie we're talking about not baseball." Abbey shouted.

"I know that Abbey. I'm trying to ethical here."

"Calling them switch hitters Sir is far from ethical. I think what you're looking for is bi-sexual."

"Charlie is not bi-sexual guys," CJ interrupted. It was a prank his friends pulled on him. This was long before he joined this administration."

"Ahh," we all said.

"So who goes next? Oliver or me?" Abbey asked. Oliver allowed Abbey to take the turn.

"This person was dared to streak across campus and actually did it too for a mere five bucks."

These guys are insane. I wrote down Josh when it was my turn. I was wrong, as was Donna and Oliver. CJ and Bartlet were correct in their guess of Toby. What hasn't this guy done?"

"Was he atleast wearing his own underwear before he got buck naked?" Donna inquired. Abbey shrugged her shoulders.

"I'm more interested in knowing how CJ and Jed knew it was Toby?"

"Toby admitted that to us both one night while we were having a meeting," Bartlet replied.

"That must have been some meeting," Oliver stated.

"You have no idea Oliver. Nor the amount of therapy it took to remove that image from my mind. Thanks to my wife now I'm going to need another appointment."

"I'm going next," Oliver declared. "This certain gentleman sleeps with a teddy bear and has ever since the day his parents brought him home."

When we get back to Washington I am seriously going to have to sit Sam, Josh, Toby and Charlie down for a good talking too. My guess was Sam. I was wrong. It was Josh. Donna was the only one to have it right.

"That's not fair. That's like insider trading," CJ complained chuckling.

Donna tossed a pillow at CJ who ducked and the President was almost knocked over. Now that is entertainment for my 20 bucks.

Abbey pointed out that Donna had 2 points and that I was the only one without a point. How nice of her to make everyone aware of my lack of knowledge.

The game continued until in the end it was Oliver who was victorious with the final win 4-3 against Donna. I however did manage to get one right. They were bound to mention something that I knew.

CJ asked who was the one that had a sister who used him for experiments with makeup. I wagered on Toby and was the only one right. I'm not kidding when I say these guys need help.

Once everyone left I climbed into bed prepared for some restless sleep. Unfortunately I couldn't erase the image of Toby running across a campus naked. I wonder if Jed's therapist allows friends to join his sessions?

***SAM***

All I can say is Thank God! I have never been so happy about losing in my entire life. If I had to spend one more night with Toby and Josh I can guarantee that one of them wasn't going to make it off of the island.

All I want to do is have a nice hot shower and buy some underwear. I have been looking forward to this night since I first stepped foot into this nightmare of a game. A nice hotel room to myself complete with a bed and electricity. What more could a man want?

I signed in at the front desk and was waiting at the elevator when Abbey came around the corner. I turned around and pretended not to notice her. The chances of her not noticing me were slim since I was looking at her through the mirror that I turned around to.

"Sam!"

I slowly turned around and put my happy face on. "Abbey," I shrieked and gave her a hug.

"You got the boot I see."

"Yeah. It couldn't have happened at a better time."

"Yeah we heard about Toby and Josh. Leo filled us in."

"Ahh. How is everyone?"

"We're all great. Oh they'll be so happy to see you."

I wanted to cry. "I'll tell you what. I'll give you half hour or so to freshen up and then we can all meet up in the lobby here."

One part of my brain was shouting no. Too bad the part that actually runs my spineless ass replied, "That would be great." Fake smile Sam, fake a smile.

The elevator came and I stepped inside after Abbey. She talked all the way up as we rode to the eighth floor. "What room are you in?"

I glanced down at the card. "Uh, 807."

"That is next to Donna. She's in 806."

Flashed another fake smile. Just swell. "Great. I'll have to stop by and say hello."

"Jed and I are in 805. CJ's in 803 I believe."

I hope she doesn't plan to tell me where everyone is. "Leo's beside CJ I know that and Oliver is in 813." Yep she was.

We got off the elevator and Abbey stopped outside her room. "You're just two doors down sweetie."

I waved my hand. "Thanks Abbey. You're the best." I slipped the card across the lock but it didn't take. I looked over at Abbey who appeared to be waiting for me to enter my room. Come on, work you stupid piece of plastic.

"Sam, is everything alright?"

"Yep. I'm fine Abbey." I tried the lock for a third time and it clicked open. Whew, that was a close one. "I'm in. Stupid cards."

Abbey winked at me. "We'll see you in a bit. I'm going to go and round the gang up."

"I can't wait," I lied to the First Lady. I waved goodbye and entered my room closing and locking the door behind me. I adore the First Lady and I like the people whom I work with. But I had been hoping to finally have some time to myself. So much for hopes.

Twenty seven minutes after my encounter with Abbey and I was on my way to the lobby as promised. I didn't run into anyone in the hallway and when I stepped off the elevator and rounded the corner I spotted them all sitting on the surrounding sofa's.

"Sam," CJ ran up and hugged me.

"CJ, it's good to see you guys." I waved to them.

"Nice to see you again Mr. Seaborn," Bartlet rose from where he was seated and shook my hand. "I understand it's pretty rough there."

"You wouldn't believe it if I told you."

"Try us," Donna prompted eagerly.

"Sure," I agreed. "But I'd like to get a drink first if you don't mind?"

"That's a good idea," Oliver waved the bartender over. I sat down and we made small talk until our drinks arrived.

I ran my hands through my hair that was still wet. "Mr. President your idea was a noble one. Unfortunately the people that were left behind were not as such."

I had the floor and I didn't know where to start. "They argued over everything. It was like one big power struggle."

"With Toby and Josh I could only imagine," Leo stated.

"Why didn't you and Charlie vote against one of them then?" Oliver asked.

"Charlie won the immunity so obviously I couldn't vote him out. Toby said he wouldn't vote against me but I practically begged him too. I knew that Charlie and Josh were gunning for me and so, here I am."

"Why on earth would you want to be kicked off Sam?"

"Honestly Oliver I had had enough. It was like World War III in there and I just wanted to get the hell out." I chuckled as I thought back to the many fights my sister and I had when we were younger. "And my parents thought they had it rough with my sister and I."

"How about you guys? What have you been up to?" I glanced at each one as they looked at one another. Did I have something on my face?

"Not much," CJ answered motioning to the bartender again.

"Yeah we have just been hanging out," Donna agreed.

"I won a hundred bucks last night. That was fun."

"Really Oliver? What you can gamble here?" I looked around for any indications but there wasn't much from the lobby's point of view.

"Not exactly," Leo said. "CJ made up a game and we all played it last night after I arrived."

"What game?" I was curious to know. I liked most of the games that CJ had taught me in the past.

"Balderdash but only a tad bit different," Oliver answered.

"Ahh," I knew exactly what they had played. "What bad things were said about me?"

They tried to look offended and then they looked confused. "You know something?" Abbey began. "I don't recall anyone saying a word about you."

"You're right Abbey. Sam wasn't mentioned once," Bartlet verified.

"I mean you were picked as the culprit, but in the end nothing." Abbey made a humph sound. "That's a shocker."

"I'm not surprised really. I mean it isn't like I have done many stupid things in my life."

"What about that time you were caught making out with your pillow?" Donna so kindly reminded me.

"Go on," CJ urged. "I hadn't heard about that one."

I awkwardly looked at my watch and gave it a slight shake. "You know what? I should be getting to bed. It's late and I want to get an early start."

"For what?" Bartlet questioned.

"Yeah, it's not like you have plans made already," Leo piped in.

"Well I was going to search out the island and maybe do some shopping." I knew already that I wasn't going to get out of here.

"I suggest we go upstairs and play again."

"In a minute Oliver. I'd like to hear about this pillow first. Donna?"

Donna looked at me apologetically. "Sorry Sam. CJ wants to know and you know how I hate to disappoint." I rolled my eyes at her and heaved a heavy sigh.

"It was while he was in sixth grade. Sam was invited to a party and he knew ahead of time that they were going to be playing spin the bottle. Being the perfectionist that he is, he wanted to be prepared incase it landed on him and he had to kiss a girl."

"Who caught him?" Leo asked waiting in anticipation for this deep dark secret.

"His girlfriend at the time," Donna answered laughing.

"Sam? Why were you making out with a pillow instead of your girlfriend?" Oliver asked me.

"Because," I answered.

"Samuel. Because isn't an answer. Now come on, fess up. We're all friends here."

Go away Abbey I wanted to shout. I didn't reply. "Sam?" Bartlet said my name as if he was concerned.

"Yes Mr. President?" I pretended to not know why he was calling my name out.

"Why were you humping a pillow?"

CJ and Oliver started laughing. Embarrassed I replied, "I wasn't humping it Sir."

"Making out with it Sam isn't much of a difference," he spoke again. CJ had tears welling up in her eyes.

"Why waste a perfectly good chick?" Oliver asked.

"Because!" I practically shouted. I lowered my voice. "Because-because I had sort of a drool problem." There it was out. Here comes the humiliation. It took a few seconds for the answer to sink in. CJ nearly fell off the sofa and Oliver looked as if he was convulsing.

"That's not funny you guys," Leo came to my defense using his stern voice. Then he started laughing as he said, "It's pathetic."

"What kind of pillow was she (beat) I mean it?"

Everyone started laughing even harder at what Oliver had said. "I hope it wasn't foam. I hear they don't return your calls," Abbey said through her laughter.

CJ kicked her foot out as she rolled over onto her side. "I bet it was a down feather, they're less pickier than the firm ones," Leo spat out.

Yuck ,Yuck, Yuck. As if I hadn't heard all these before. Donna had to go and open her big mouth. That's it. Without too much consideration I blurted out. "Did Donna ever tell you about the time she got caught making out with a cardboard cut out of the New Kids on the Block?" Suddenly laughing at me wasn't so much fun anymore.

Donna turned three shades of red and she was soon shaking her head and mouthing the word stop. I continued on. "Oh yeah, and she was caught by none other than a New Kid himself. Only I can't remember which one. Donna?"

All eyes were upon Donna who looked as though she wanted to crawl under a rock. While they began hounding her I quietly slipped away and headed back to my hotel room for some peace and quiet finally.

Maybe that other part of the island wasn't so bad after all. However, had the situation been reversed and it was someone else in my shoes I would be laughing at them too. I just hated that it was me.

Come to think of it, Mary Ellen never did let me kiss her again and I never did go to that party. I was to afraid after she told everyone about me. What I would give to run into that big blabbermouth now. I'd give her a kiss that would knock her stupid pig tails right off!


	4. Chapter 4

TITLE: "I Can't Believe They Voted Me Out" (4/4)

RATING: AA  
>CHARACTERS: Toby and the gang<br>SUMMARY: Each person's view in order that they were voted out of the "fantasy survivor game."

POV: Each character.

DISCLAIMER: The characters used from the West Wing do not belong to me; they are the property of Aaron Sorkin.

TIMEFRAME: Continues from "Where's Gilligan?"

***JOSH***

Look out ladies. That's right, Lyman Lover is island bound. Man, look at the babes around here. If I had known about this place I would have voted for myself the first night. That's right honey keep checking out the Josh man. A tall redhead was eyeballing me. Yep, she wants some.

While the hot babe behind the front desk was registering me I kept my eyes on the many women who were roaming free. I looked up at the ceiling and mouthed, 'thank you God.' Blondie handed me my card and I was bound for my room. I wanted to have a quick shower before I went out to babe watch.

Ah, that feels better. I roamed through my suitcase that was kept for me and found my cologne. The chicks just love this stuff. I splashed a bit on me. Was that enough? Better make sure they can smell it. I put some more on. Now I'm ready.

I stepped onto the terrace and allowed my eyes to wander and take in the beauty of the island. By that I meant of course all the lovely ladies. I think tonight I'll be Dr. Brad from New York. Chicks love a Doctor from New York. Oh, brunette at 4 o'clock.

I walked nonchalantly over to the mystery lady who was at the bar. I leaned against the counter. "Hi there," I said using my sexy tone.

The brunette glanced over at me and smiled. "Hello," she had such a soft voice.

"I'm Brad. Dr. Brad from New York," God I'm irresistible

"You're a Doctor?"

"Yeah," I sighed. "It's my way of giving back to the community."

"Really? What branch of medicine do you practice?" Huh? "I'm a Physician myself." Time to go.

"That's great," I looked over at the entrance. "Oh, there's my friend. It was nice talking to you." Quick getaway. Woo, that could have been embarrassing.

"Well I'll be damned if it isn't Joshua "King of the Bullshit" Lyman." While trying to get away from the Dr. Brunette I had unwillingly ran smack dabbed into CJ.

"CJ!"

"I can't say I'm not upset to see your backstabbing ass here," CJ seemed a tad bitter.

The brunette walked past us. "Catch you later Dr. Brad," she said waving.

CJ turned to view the girl and then looked back at me. "Dr. Brad?" she was using her angry voice. I didn't respond. I was still thinking of a lie.

"Dr. Brad?" CJ repeated again, this time a little louder. "You've been here for what a half hour? And already you're lying to people?" CJ sniffed around. "What the hell is that smell?"

"I can explain."

"This I have got to hear," she folded her arms across her chest. She really wanted me to explain?

"I didn't want to be recognized."

"Recognized for what?"

I jerked my head. "For being an employee of the White House CJ. You know how these people get when they're around celebrities."

CJ laughed. "Since when is the Deputy Chief of Staff a celebrity in Fiji?"

"People know who I am CJ."

"Yeah but as an asshole Josh. Not as the Deputy Chief of Staff."

"Okay, that hurt."

"I've got more from where that came from." I gulped.

"Look I just came down to get a drink and-"

"Well you can have one upstairs."

"Upstairs? I've already been to my room CJ and as nice as it is, I would rather be out here."

"Can you smell that? It's like cheap nail polish or something." I sniffed the air. I didn't smell anything.

CJ leaned in and sniffed me and then quickly covered her nose. "My God Josh, you reek."

"What?" I smelled my shirt. Smelled nice to me. "I smell nice CJ."

"You smell like a whore. What did you do bathe in it?"

"No, I just splashed some on."

"Some? Or the entire bottle? Don't you know that less is more?"

CJ grabbed my arm. "CJ, where are you going with my arm?"

"You've got to change that shirt before you join the rest of us. We'll end up getting high off the fumes." Without choice I allowed CJ to drag me to the elevator. We stepped inside. "Skunks smell better than that Josh. What kind is it?"

"I don't know. Donna bought it for me last Christmas."

The elevator opened. Walking past with a bucket of ice was Sam. "Josh!" he cried out.

"Hey Sam."

"You got the boot I see."

"Yep. Had I known about this place and all the hotties I would have been here sooner. You've been holding out on me," I teased.

Somehow I managed to get pushed into the room belonging to Oliver and that was where everyone was hanging out. They all called my name out. I waved and said hello.

"What is that smell?" Abbey asked. Her face was scrunched up as though she had caught a whiff of a skunk or something.

"That would be Josh," CJ informed Abbey.

"You could have atleast showered Josh before you joined us," Bartlet said to me.

"I did shower."

"In what the sewer?"

"Donna, this is the stuff you gave me for Christmas."

"I didn't give you that Josh. I gave you nice stuff."

"Donna, it's the same stuff."

"Maybe it doesn't work on you," Oliver suggested.

I looked at Oliver. "How does cologne not work? Besides, everything works well on me."

That got a laugh. Why were they laughing at me? "You'll never guess what I found I him doing?"

"Picking up women I bet," Donna answered.

"Yeah, and you'll be happy to know Abbey that Josh has changed professions."

"Oh," Abbey said interested. "And what is Joshy today?"

"Dr. Brad," CJ looked at me. "I didn't catch your medical field though?"

"Proctology," Bartlet answered in place of Josh.

"It seems our Josh here is afraid of being recognized by his celebrity. Therefore creating himself a new persona."

"Nothing wrong with that," Leo said. "I'll be glad to find a replacement for Josh when we get back to Washington."

"Hey," I said trying to be offended. "It was a joke."

"You find the medical field a joke Josh?" Oh oh. Wrong choice of words.

"I'll do anything if we can just change the topic and start fresh."

"You might want to remove your foot from your mouth first," Bartlet said. Ha ha Sir.

I joined Sam on the bed and accepted a drink from Abbey. "So, what have you guys been up to?"

"Gossip," Donna answered.

I got excited. "Really? I like gossip. Who are we talking about?" They looked at one another.

"Technically you. But since you're here I guess we have to find someone else," Oliver replied.

"Me? Why would you gossip about me?" 

"We thought it would be boring too. But it turns out Donna has a lot of stuff on you. It was quite fascinating," Sam said.

"Please. Donna knows nothing about me that would be interesting or embarrassing."

"Where's your teddy bear Josh? Wouldn't want you to have troubles sleeping?"

I glanced at CJ and then at Donna. "You told them about Bunky?"

From the corner of my eye I caught Bartlet's drink flying through the air. "Bunky?" he repeated wiping his mouth.

"I-uh-I," I glanced at Donna again. "You're fired," I said pointing my finger at her.

"No I'm not," she replied.

"Remember CJ's revised game of Balderdash?"

I looked at Sam, "yeah."

"That's what they played the night before I got here. And then we played it this morning because I was here."

"Cool. Let's play again."

"God, no. I can't take anymore information on you guys. I already know more than I should," Leo stated.

"Come on Leo. I wasn't here. I want to play a gossip game too."

"As much as I have to come to love the game I don't think I can listen to one more Toby story."

"Okay then Abbey. How about we change it a bit then."

"I'm listening Josh."

"How about we gossip about THOSE in the room as opposed to those who are not here to defend themselves?"

"That could work," Oliver shrugged and looked around for other people's responses.

"I don't know," Bartlet said weary. "I'm not sure if I like the idea of you knowing personal information about me."

"I'm in," Abbey said cheerfully as she refilled her drink.

"Isn't this kind of the same thing as we did when we first came to the island?" Donna inquired.

"Well that was fun too," Sam answered.

"Okay here's the plan. One by one we will reveal our most embarrassing moment in our lives. With honesty too guys," I explained.

"Okay," they said in chorus. Some happier than the others.

"Alright. Who wants to go first?"

"It's your game. You go first," CJ pointed out.

I clapped my hands together and then pointed at CJ. "Good thinking."

"Okay, we're going back a long time here. I was in third grade and-"

Oliver started snoring. "Come on Josh. Third grade? How exciting can this be?"

"No wait, it gets better."

"New plan," CJ said. "We each reveal the first time we had sex."

"Right on," Oliver said bouncing on his ass.

Bartlet shrugged and Leo looked horrified. Well we all knew who his first was.

"And full details," Abbey added in. I agreed. This did sound better than my third grade story.

"You're still first though Josh."

"It's your game CJ."

"Too bad. You're up." Nobody challenged her. This woman power thing sucks. Here goes nothing. I was thinking when Bartlet interrupted.

"Is this a mini series or what Josh?"

"Sir, I'm trying to remember."

"You don't remember your first time?" Leo asked as though it was a crime.

"Yes," I hissed. "I remember my first time. (pause) I just don't remember who the girl was."

"Joshua," Donna shouted upset.

Sam nudged me and whispered in my ear. I smiled. "That's right. Okay, I was 14 years old and she was my babysitter."

"Oh that is so gross," Donna exclaimed bunching her face.

"Lovely," Leo whispered to Bartlet.

"He's your Deputy Leo," Bartlet reminded him.

"So anyways, she's over on a Friday night and I'm just chilling-"

"Oh God he said chilling'," CJ started laughing. Abbey joined her. I gave CJ a look. "I'm sorry Josh. You were hanging in your crib just chilling. (pause) Go on."

"Ha ha. Very funny CJ."

Leo looked at the President. "I don't get it. Am I missing something?"

Bartlet shrugged. "Beats the hell out of me. I think the babysitter put him in a crib."

"Anyways," I said raising my voice over them. "She asked me if I was interested in watching the movie 'Halloween' with her and offered to make some popcorn. So I agreed and while we were watching the movie she began to run her hand-"

"Which one was Halloween?" Leo asked Oliver.

"The one where Jason comes back from the water I think."

"That was Friday the 13th," CJ corrected. "Halloween had Jamie Lee Curtis."

"Who?" Bartlet asked.

"Jamie Lee Curtis Sir. She's the queen of scream. Although I never thought she was all that myself. I think Sam's is a lot better."

"Thanks CJ," Sam replied sarcastically.

"She was the one in Terror Train, The Fog…"

Bartlet was still unaware of who she was.

"She was the wife in True Lies Jed," Abbey filled him in.

"Ahh. Okay I know who she is now," he turned to Leo. "Did you ever see that movie True Lies? I thought it was great considering it was an action movie. That Tom Arnold is a funny guy."

"Excuse me, I was talking," I announced.

"You're done."

"No I'm not Sir. I was just getting started."

"The bad babysitter ran her hand up your leg, you started kissing, yada yada and you lost your cherry," Bartlet rolled his eyes. "See, you're done. Who's next?"

I leaned against the wall and downed my drink hoping for a fast buzz. I wonder what Toby and Charlie are doing?

***TOBY***

Thank goodness this is finally over. That is all I have to say. I knew from the beginning that I didn't want to win.

All along I wanted it to be Charlie. And I don't say that because I lost. He beat me fair and square. But should I have won, I would have given him the house regardless.

I find him more deserving of all of us considering the life he so bravely leads. He played a fabulous game and I was just happy to have been a part of it with him at the end.

I glanced over at Charlie. He was busy being congratulated by everyone and I tried my best to make a mad dash from CJ but I didn't succeed.

"Ah Toby," she called as she came closer.

I took a few steps back. "Hey CJ, how are you doing?"

"Never mind how I'm doing Toby. I'd be more concerned about yourself once I get my hands on you."

"Would it help if I said I'm sorry?"

"It might save you a few bones but not many."

Shit. "It was just a game CJ."

"Oh really? Screwing your friend over is a game to you?"

Okay that didn't come out the way I wanted it to. How do women always manage to twist your words? Do they learn this in a special class?

"That's not what I meant."

CJ stepped forward and I thought she was going to hit me. Instead she surprised me by hugging me. "I'm only kidding with you, you big lug."

I laughed with a slight hesitation. "You missed me didn't you?"

"Of course not," she replied without a second thought. I took a shot.

"You lost on purpose didn't you?" CJ accused.

"No," I tried to chuckle off. "Why would you say that?"

"Because I know damn well you know Hogan's name."

I tried to keep a straight face but I couldn't. I never could with CJ. "Shh," I said putting my finger to my lips.

"Just when I think I have you figured out you and go and do something noble."

We walked over to the stand and sat down. "So, what did you do while I was stuck out here?"

"Not much. The usual. I hung out, drank, had sex, ate and gossiped."

"Excuse me?"

CJ turned her face slightly to the left of me and smiled. "What?"

"Don't you what me. You know exactly what I'm talking about."

She laughed loud. "You noticed that did you?"

"I'm not deaf CJ. I pick up words like sex you know."

"Would that bother you?"

"Do you really need me to answer that?"

"Oh Toby I think I did actually miss you," CJ threw her arms around me. I didn't respond.

"Seriously CJ. Let's back up to the sex part?"

CJ slapped me off the arm. "I was kidding Toby."

"Oh," I exclaimed. "I'm sorry was that meant to be funny?"

"You're cranky," CJ pointed out.

"And you are so hot right now," I didn't intend for that to come out.

"Really?" CJ purred back. "I get even hotter you know."

Oh sweet Jesus. "So where's this hotel you guys mentioned earlier?" I grinned at CJ. She laughed again.

"Keep dreaming Ziegler. I'm a woman who needs to be romanced," CJ stood and stretched her body. I kept my eyes on her.

"Okay so I'll hum." CJ eyed me.

"You really want me don't you Ziegler?" CJ asked this as though she was completely taken back. Of course I wanted her. What man wouldn't?

I nodded my head and grinned at her again. At that moment Oliver came up to me. "Hey Toby. Good game."

"Thanks Oliver," I didn't remove CJ from my vision.

"Say Toby," Oliver began.

"Can this wait Oliver?" In other words, go away. I'm trying to score here.

"Well I was curious about something."

"Yeah and what's that?"

"How does one go about grabbing the wrong pair of underwear without noticing?" WHAT?

"I beg your pardon?" My eyes left CJ and wandered over to Oliver.

"Well I heard about your night of panty wearing and I was confused about-"

"How the hell did you hear about that?" I slowly looked back at CJ. She quickly turned away from me. "CJ?"

"I should go and congratulate Charlie," she said backing away from me.

"I'm not done with you yet," I called out as she continued walking backwards.

"You haven't come close to starting yet Ziegler," she smiled and turned around.

"So anyways," Oliver continued.

"Oliver?"

"Yeah Toby?"

"Go far away," I stood up. I want to go home.

***CHARLIE***

Yes! Yes! I can't believe I did it. I won! I won! Okay, try and remain calm. Breathe. Screw that. I won!

Toby shook my hand. "You played a great game Charlie. I'm glad you won. Congratulations."

"Thanks man. You did great too," we gave each other a half hug and patted one another.

"Go have fun," Toby told me pointing at Tony who was coming to hand me my new house keys. House keys. I have a house. Wait until Seantelle and Deanna hear about this. Who's the man!

"Charlie, congratulations young man," the President said to me with his hand out and I accepted. "You did a great job. I'm proud of you."

"Thank you Sir."

"How do you feel?" Abbey asked me as she stepped aside her husband.

"Oh man. I'm shocked."

Abbey and the President laughed. "I bet."

"I can't believe I won. It all feels like a dream."

"Well believe it son. You deserved it," the President held on to my shoulder for a second before releasing.

Abbey gave me a kiss on the cheek. "I'm very happy for you Charlie." She turned around to leave.

"Abbey?" I said hesitantly.

"Yes Charlie?" She turned back towards me.

"Do you think my parents are proud of me?"

Abbey took some time before replying. "Yes I do sweetie. I think they are very proud of the young man you have become. If they were here with us now that's exactly what they would tell you."

That gave me some reassurance. "Thanks Abbey."

"There's no need to thank me Charlie. I am sure you have exceeded their expectations," she winked at me.

Leo and Sam came and congratulated me. For the next twenty minutes everything was like a blur. All I wanted to do was go home to my wife and Deanna and tell them the good news.

I have never felt so good about myself. I feel as if I have achieved every goal I ever dreamed. I had a great family, a great job and the best friends a person could ask for.

I'm a very lucky person and I don't take my good fortune for granted. Life is too precious for that. I learned that the hard way.

Toby had just finished talking to Oliver. Our eyes locked and he gave me a thumbs up and the biggest smile I have ever seen on Toby Ziegler's face. That boy's got teeth!

These people that are surrounding me now help me be the best person I could be. Thank you Mrs. Fiderer.


End file.
